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Fatiha-tuyi (matchmaking)

07 July 2017

The marriage is a result of permission and blessing of the parents, and it is celebrated in several stages. When a son attains majority, his parents start looking for proper girl for him. The close relatives, neighbors and friends participate in this process. When the girl has been found, the aunts visit the girl’s home on various pretexts to look at her, make the acquaintance of her parents and to see the living conditions of prospective bride. Thereafter neighbors and familiars make inquiries about the family of selected girl. In case of getting positive references they send the matchmakers. One of the main procedures of marriage is “fatiha-tuyi” (betrothal or affiance). By mutual agreement of both parties, eldest people fix the day of betrothal. The well-know in the neighborhood old men, the chairman of Mahalla, relatives and the girl’s friends gather in the girl’s home this day. After intermediaries state the purposes of their coming, “non sindirish” (word for word – “a flat cake piecing”) rite starts. From this moment the newly married couple is considered betrothed. “Fatiha-tuyi” is finished with fixing date of marriage and wedding. Everybody of intermediaries is presented with dastarhan containing two flat cakes, sweeties, and the presents made by the girl’s party are handed over to the bridegroom and his parents. After intermediaries return to the bridegroom’s home, they hand over trays with presents, and “sarpo kurar” (presentation of presents) ceremony starts. Usually dastarhan is unwrapped by the woman having many children or the oldest woman. All gathered people help themselves to sweeties and pastry brought from the bride’s home. This ceremony finishes the betrothal ritual. From the moment of “fatiha-tuy” making and right until wedding the parents and relatives of the newly married couple resolve the problems of dowry and organizational issues, relating to wedding solemnization. 1 or 2 days before wedding the girl solemnizes “kiz oshi” (hen party) rite, to which invites all her close family and friends.

Modern Uzbek people, as a rule, have an option to choose a couple, though the custom to rely on the choice of parents is also preserved, especially in rural areas of Uzbekistan. The ceremony itself is strictly observed today. Sovchi (matchmaker) appoint a day when guests would come in the house of the bride.

Matchmakers state the purpose of their visit and if parents of the bride agree, they make the ceremony of “Non sindirish” (bread breaking) after which the girl is deemed to be engaged. The wedding day is appointed and relatives of the bride give gifts to the matchmakers for the relatives of the groom.

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